Have you ever noticed the increase of pressure and static in your mind around the holidays? For me before Allie, it all revolved around my weight. And the judgement that I feared would come at me once again gaining back weight that I had lost. Now with having Allie, I still have that static playing around in my head but it is often overshadowed by the louder static, screaming that I am not doing enough. 

I don’t know about you but this week I feel like I was running at hyper-speed, or at least trying to at the start of the week. I was trying to make the most out of every second, of every minute, of the day. If I am going to do laundry then while that load is going, I can read Allie her devotional, open up the coffee maker to let it dry, put the loaf of bread in the oven, after the book I can do the dishes, and then maybe be able to make the bed before the load is done. And really the coffee maker should happen right after the laundry is put in and then the bread should go into the oven because that all can be drying and baking while I am reading Allie her Bible stories. But I should be starting her day off with the Bible, like I do my own and let the chores wait until after. But then I could not finish all these things I can get done while the laundry is going and I’ve wasted all that time….

With the start of every new year, there is also the many resolutions made. Many of which will make it no longer than the first couple of weeks of the new year. At least that is how many of my resolutions went until the year I stopped making resolutions. Instead of resolutions I started a jar of keepsakes throughout the year. A jar filled with movie stubs, concert tickets, event tickets, wrists bands, restaurant receipts, pictures, shells, etc, any and everything that marked the events of the year. Even the sadder moments, like the hand out from my Mimi’s funeral. The years go by so fast, that at the end of the year instead of focusing on all that God had done and taken place, I was hyper focused on what I wanted to do or change for the coming year. But I think it’s important to pause and take a moment to look back over the year and give thanks for all that God has done and all the ways that He has shown up in our day to day lives. 

Happy New Year! Welcome to 2026 Ladies! Can you believe that we are in 2026? That we all survived the joy and chaos of another holiday season to ring in a new year? I don't know about you but this year flew by and also felt like there were many years between January and December all at the same time. 

We have officially entered into the Holiday Season! I am sure I am not the only momma who feels like her plate is running over already. There are gifts to think through, holiday crafts, holiday cooking, traditions, decorations, and the list just goes on and on. Right on top of the other millions of items we keep track of, manage, and keep alive during our day to day routines.

Alright it is 2 o’clock in the afternoon. I am on my second cup of strong coffee and I’ve got dinner, apple cider and cookies going. And I am fired up just enough to talk about the “Mom Guilt”! It feels like no matter how much I may get right, how much I get done, and how much I put myself together, “Mom Guilt” is waiting in the corner for the one item that doesn’t get accomplished. 

Expectations have been a common subject in a lot of conversations I have been a part of the last couple weeks. And though we all have different expectations, the process that each of us have to go through when expectations we have set need to be adjusted or doesn’t happen at all can look very similar. When you’ve tucked an idea, vision, or a goal into your heart and mind, it doesn’t always just transition or adjust easily. I know for me there is a mourning/processing stage that has to take place, even when I know the change is for the better. I tend to build dreams and visions around certain expectations that are very detailed and thought out. So all of those details also have to be shifted as well.    

I am sure we have all seen the videos of glasses filled with dirty water that is being poured into one glass from another glass and it continues like this until one glass starts having clean water poured in. Eventually this outside source of clean water removes all the dirt and the glass is now able to pour out clean water into the next glass. 

I’ve been thinking about lasts a lot lately. Like when Allie nursed for the last time, took a bottle for the last time. The last night it was just my hubby and I in our home. The last morning we got to sleep in past 7:30. And wondering what other lasts we will all be experiencing as life continues to move forward. 

I am fighting an ear infection right now. So I can’t really hear so well out of my left ear and though the pain has subsided a bit I still have lots of pressure. This infection has just kicked my butt and made me really slow down. Which of course led to a whole breakdown on Sunday night because I felt like I was failing and letting down my family because I am not able to do all the things that I feel I should be doing.

This weekend I got to attend a Women’s Brunch at our church! It was amazing! It was great to be able to sit with other ladies and just have time in fellowship. I was also super excited when I read that the message was going to be on Proverbs 3:5-6 NKJV

With the murder of a very known public speaker/defender of the Christian faith this week, I have been questioning and wondering what Allie’s future will look like when she is an adult. The track that our country and world is going at the moment has me concerned. I understand that scripture talks about the degrees to which the world will evolve into a deeper state of darkness as it gets closer to the second coming of Jesus Christ. And before Allie, I was able to sit a lot easier in that truth and see the constant falling away of this world as steps closer to Christ’s return. And though I still do see these moments that way, it takes a lot more prayer and surrender to get there.